雅思写作地图题目，雅思地图类小作文

雅思写作地图题目，雅思地图类小作文2，6.5分作文点评 修改1，学生作文 (6.5分)每篇范文都有配音，在同名公众号“英语考试Cat”你好呀，我是来自加拿大的雅思外教Mac。今天，给大家带来一个雅思地图类小作文的范文。老规矩，以下是正文目录：

爱吃辣的加拿大大叔

雅思托福10多年一线教学

中文说得还不错，头像是他家猫

在这里分享他原创的雅思写作干货

每篇范文都有配音，在同名公众号“英语考试Cat”

你好呀，我是来自加拿大的雅思外教Mac。今天，给大家带来一个雅思地图类小作文的范文。

老规矩，以下是正文目录：

1，学生作文 (6.5分)

2，6.5分作文点评 修改

3，修改 优化后版本 (8分)

4，范文朗读

5，范文详解

上题：

我学生的版本：

The two maps illustrate the development of Frenton from the year of 1990 to 2012.

Overall more blocks of apartment buildings have been built and more facilities were constructed in the area throughout the twelve-year period.

A high street going from northeast to southwest divided the town into two parts. The west side saw the local school and library remain unchanged whereas the hospital expanded twice in size. The former playground with trees sitting in the north side of Frenton next to the high street turned into residential blocks while the southwest corner occupied by trees in the past has been transferred into a technopark during this phase.

The east side of the town on the other hand experienced a similar transformation. The previous café and park sitting in the center and taking up half of the east side has been developed into a hotel and golf course of the same size with apartment buildings to the north. Adjacent to the park where rolls of houses used to be situated now saw a community of apartments. The theater and shops to the south of the park have been converted into a cinema and supermarket.

Mac点评：

• Task Achievement 写作任务完成情况: 7分 (could have been more extended—more detail 不够具体，不够细节)
• 
  
• Coherence & Cohesion 连贯与衔接: 6分 (lack of conjunctive terms eg. ‘likewise’ and ‘while’ and incorrect usage of ‘on the other hand’ 缺乏连接词，'on the other hand' 用错)
• 
  
• Lexical Resource 词汇丰富程度: 7分 (some incorrect vocabulary eg. ‘transferred’ 部分词汇用错，比如'transferred')
• 
  
• Grammar Range 语法多样性及准确性: 6分 (prepositions and verb tense/voice 介词搭配不当，部分时态准确，语态不准确)
• 
  
• Total 总分：6.5

我的修改：

修改 优化后的版本，往下拉

- Model Answer 高分范文 & 范文朗读 -

▲范文音频戳这里▲

The two maps illustrate the development of Frenton from the year 1990 to 2012.

Overall more blocks of apartment buildings were built and more facilities constructed in the area throughout the twelve-year period.

The high street running from the northeast to the southwest divided the town into two parts. The west side saw the local school and library remain unchanged; whereas the hospital had been expanded to twice its size. The former playing field with trees sitting on the north side of Frenton next to the high street was turned into residential blocks while in the southwest corner a wooded area in the past had been redesigned into a technopark.

On the east side of town it likewise experienced a similar transformation. The previous café and park sitting in the center and taking up half of the east side was developed into a hotel and golf course. Adjacent to the park where rows of houses used to be situated were replaced with a community of apartments. The theater and shops to the south of the park were converted into a cinema and supermarket while to the northwest of the newly converted apartment block saw another block of apartments being built.

- Essay Analysis 范文解析 -

本文里表示方位的词/搭配有：

• running from ... to ...
• the west side
• sitting on the north side of
• next to
• in the southwest corner
• on the east side of
• sitting in the center
• adjacent to
• be situated
• to the south of
• to the northwest of

本文里表达变化的词/搭配有：

• the development of...from...to...
• more ... were built
• more ... constructed
• remained unchanged
• had been expanded
• was turned into
• had been redesigned into
• experienced a similar transformation
• the previous ... was developed into a...
• used to
• were replaced with
• were converted into
• the newly converted

以上就是我今天分享的关于雅思的部分干货，如果你在考雅思，或单纯想提升英语，做1个动作：点击关注我，及时收看更多干货好文。

祝各位早日和雅思分手，加油！